The small road striped between the beach and hotels. Booths and
seafood restaurant set beside the road. The smell of the salty water,
freshness, and seafood from the side of the seashore arose in the air. People are
buying things and walking along the shore with big smiles on each of their
face.
A white land of sands fills with beautiful shinny shells and
kids running around. The white and soft sand that when we step on, we can feel
how smooth it is. The sound of the waves that lash to the shore, the sound of
nature, what a wonderful thing. The bright sun shone above the clear water. Seeing
through the water, there’s rocks and smooth sand. It is so clear that we can
even see the bottom the sea. The seashore went on and on, as far as I could
see. It was filled with foreigners and hardworking natives. The hermit crab
walked across the white sand to flee away from the people walking around. Umbrellas
opened and putted parallel to the beach. Plenty of seat for relaxing and
sunbathe. During certain spot, there is a banana boat for playing and
entertaining the tourist. The young kids and teenagers who rode on it burst out
with smiles and laughter.
On the other side of
the shore was a huge group of mountains with a temple on one of the peak and a
wonderful nature. When the hot sun flashed on the holy temple, the aura of
peace and calm spread all over.
Looking toward the sea, there is a beautiful island. There
is an island, an island of natural resources and bird’s nest, the island of gold.
My eyes focus on a young boy who walked along the seashores.
He looked perfectly handsome just like a model from one of the magazine. His
white-blue shirt blew along with the soft wind, his hazelnut-colored eyes scientillate when it hits the sun,
and his pinkish-orange lip seems unbelievable that it is a boy’s lip. As he
walked, his slipper sank into the wet sand. His emotion that he showed makes me
stare at him. He looked sedate and calm just like the sea behind him. His mouth
moved. I try to read his lips, but it was too far to see. I looked the other
way to focus more on him, and I realized that he has disappeared.
Hello Natcha! Nice work you've done here. I can already see myself sunbathing in that beach. Hahahah. Though there're some grammatical mistakes, I'm sure your readers wouldn't even notice them. I like how you describe the aspects of the beach, especially when the part about the aura of the temple, "When the hot sun flashed on the holy temple, the aura of peace and calm spread all over. It really was an agreeable idea to put metaphors in the passage to describe it. Nice work! I enjoyed reading your essay :D P.S. Who's that hazelnut-colored-eyes-boy you saw at the beach? ;)
ReplyDeletecomment by Apichaya Period 8
5555 my cousin, he's handsome!
ReplyDeleteHi~ And I'm commenting beside you now XD
ReplyDeleteYour work is very nice~
I can imagine the beach that you mentioned very well.
And the aura of it.
I especially like the part that you mentioned about the "handsome young boy" It made me feel that you really look at him carefully and that he is in your mind until now.
And is he more handsome than my Kise? XD
They're both handsome 55
Deletethank you for commenting
Nice writing, Natcha! I love how you described the beach so beautifully and how I can really imagine how it looks like. The way you describe it is amazing, and I enjoyed reading it. Perhaps there were some grammatical errors, but it doesn't really matter because you will be able to improve it for the next one. I love how you tell the readers about the boy with the hazelnut-colored-eyes, seems like he is really handsome xD keep it up!
ReplyDelete-Regina Hutagalung, p8